Through Fresh Eyes

As the newest addition to the Support Team I thought I knew what I was up against. Lets face it - I’ve been a part of Eddystone, albeit in a different capacity for a few years now. I’ve met and greeted, made tea, staffed information stalls, collected money and handed out red ribbons and challenged stigma and discrimination. I know and understand the issues that HIV+ people face and go through every day ... don’t I?

I seriously underestimated the hours spent attending hospital appointments sat in clinical waiting rooms waiting for my number to be called.

I did not properly comprehend sitting discussing every aspect of my condition however embarrassed or undignified it makes me feel whilst a stranger, although experienced and helpful, takes 2 ½ hours to fill in an application form for DLA (imagine how long it would take someone who has never seen anything quite like this before), and then there’s the prospect of repeating the whole process again should I want to apply for other benefits.

I really hadn’t considered the complexities of taking medicines at the same time every day, regardless of how they are affecting both how my body feels now, and their effect on my body in the future.

I admit freely that I had no idea how traumatic it is to receive a positive diagnosis if you are from a country where HIV is equal to death, and on top of that I am alone and scared.

However I can truly say that I have never underestimated the strength, resolve, dignity and courage of the people that I have been supporting in the last few months. There may sometimes be tears but there is also laughter and I feel privileged to be allowed to see through fresh eyes.

Vannessa